Wednesday, January 21, 2009

I'm not Mean -- Just Crazy

One of the things that God has been prompting me to change is my temper with my children. He worked as He generally does -- first bringing awareness of this sin to me, then helping me to work to overcome it by showing me what MY part is in the whole cycle (namely selfish guarding of "my" time and not having the proper expectations of my children's behavior).

That's the short story, but the fact is that this has been a years-long process, and one in which I finally seem to be making some progress.

But then last week, I was irritable. My children annoyed me. I just couldn't seem to get it right. I shared my shortcomings with a close friend, and said I just didn't know what was wrong with me.

"PMS?" she suggested in seriousness, knowing the havoc that a woman's hormones can play on her in her late 30's (oh, how it hurt me to write that, but at 38, I guess it's fitting).

"No. I don't think so. I guess I'm just mean."

Well, a day or so later, Mother Nature showed that those feelings of irritations over the past few days probably were due to PMS, and I rejoiced a little bit.

Not that it's an excuse to behave however I wish, but at least I understand the loss of control over my emotions.

I am not good at keeping up with my cycle, obviously, but Christina Tynan-Wood gave a fun use of the internet in her book How to be a Geek Goddess, which I think I'm going to start using: Woman Calendar (compatible with all sorts of devices, and available for a free trial), and Advanced Woman Calendar (I'm using a free trial) can each predict when you will receive your monthly visitor up to a month in advance.

So next time I'm feeling irritable with my children, I can apply the proper remedy: some quality time with them, a scheduled a break for me, or a Midol.

(I'm editing this to add it to Works for Me Wednesday. Last week I talked about throw up, this week another fluid, but I don't plan on making it a weekly feature).

12 comments:

Dianne said...

It does help to give ourselves a break from time to time. And I think recognizing our susceptibility to hormonal fluctuations is actually an act of humility, rather than giving ourselves a bye on sin.

heather said...

You know, when I got married almost 4 years ago, I began to realize how selfish I am. One of the things that scares me about having kids is now knowing how selfish I am! I love my time alone, being able to basically create my own schedule, sleep until I want, stay up until I want, work when I want (well, more than I want but still on my schedule). If I'm PMS'ing, I simply tell my husband, and he knows to stay out of my way. I don't think I could exactly tell dependents, hey, stay out of Mommy's way today. That scares me. I'll scar my children for life.

Melissa @ Breath of Life said...

I was on the hormone train until a forced hysterectomy at 35 (5 years ago). I feel so much better these days...I don't miss that part of my life one bit. However, there are definite signs that the train's coming back to town for my girl in the too near future!

Wanda said...

I am the PMS Queen! I have had it for my entire adult life. My family has been amazing through it all.
My body turns into someone else's property when it happens.
I would love to live victorious over it. I've tried so many things. Diet really helps...and exercise.
but sometimes...it just overtakes ya.

Carrie said...

A LOUD LOL to your last sentence.....

Other than that, I have to say that I have it pretty easily. I do have a brief temper flare up which tells me "it's coming!" but otherwise, life is pretty good. However, that temper flare up is never pleasant and it always happens over something totally un-worth it! Which is why that's such a good indicator...

TuTu's Bliss said...

Hugs!
Hubby says, "Is it THAT time?". EXCUSE ME? It is not THAT time, this is about you getting on my nerves. Now please pick up some tampons on your way back. Hmmm maybe I should just admit that sometimes it is just THAT time.

Sitesx6 said...

O LORD have mercy, do I relate. I struggle with moods during the dreaded cycle each month. I was having HORRIBLE insomnia for years, hot flashes, and other issues, finally I couldn't take it a minute longer. I saw my Dr. and we did a saliva test to check my hormone levels. My estrogen was way high and my progesterone way low....I'm now on Progesterone, and I love life. I sleep like a baby, no hot flashes at all, and my moods are better controlled (not perfect yet, but better).

Hang in there.
Kelly

Stephanie's Mommy Brain said...

I've been crazy for about 6 years! About the time I'm starting to feel like my "normal" self I get pregnant again. It's a vicious "cycle." ;)

BarbaraLee said...

Have you tried good old fashion vitamins? This helped me a lot. Make sure they are good though. Not full of sugar.
A lack of B's is usually the case. Increase when your close to your cycle.

Katrina said...

I tend to just get bizarrely weepy w/ PMS. I'm not usually much of a crier, so it bothers me when not only am I crying, but it's over something stupid!

morninglight mama said...

Oh my, the week before I am due, I turn into a serious Momzilla-- I know it, but I'm still working on fixing it. I've never used Midol-- wonder if it would work to clear up general crabbiness?? :)

Karla E said...

I just get into MAJOR organizing mode...not necessarily a bad thing, but my dear husband gets a little scared at that time.

I'm not sure I "get" the usefulness of the calendars, unless you are trying to get (or not get) pregnant using the calendar. For regular cycle things, it seems like a regular calendar would work just fine.