Wednesday, February 25, 2009

I Wonder as I Wander

When Amanda was four years old, we got a new family member.

Puppy Wonder was her alter-ego. She was some kind of puppy superhero, and had a somewhat vague and fuzzy backstory. One day I was asking how she got her name.

"It's because she is always wandering around," Amanda answered.

"Ah, so Puppy Wonder is really Puppy Wander," I thought.

Interesting. No matter. She remained Puppy Wonder in name and her role in Amanda's life and that of her friends. As Amanda got older, the lore surrounding Puppy Wonder became more complex, convoluted, and creative.

I am currently working on the Elizabeth George study Loving God with All Your Mind. I'm not really a worrier, which is a prime focus of the book, but I know that God has something for me. Going through some of the scriptures recently, I was reminded of the correlation between wondering and wandering.

We can so easily allow our minds to wander away from God's sovereignty as we wonder about what the future holds. But what does Jesus command?

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:34).

And as a further command of what to do when we are not worrying:

This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it (Psalm 118:24, emphasis mine).
As a mom, it seems like I rarely live in the present. When the kids were babies, I would think, "Soon they'll be able to do thus-and-so," or even, "Soon they will be giving up that nap, and then what will I do?"

Kyle is starting Kindergarten next year, which will be a big change in schedule, and a big milestone for him. I've been thinking and planning for this for over a year! Likewise, Amanda changed schools this year, and will change again in another year, on which I think and speculate. Why, I've even thought about what will happen when she goes to college -- in eight years!!

I've finally come to realize that it's fine. It will all work out. Each day has enough trouble of its own, and each day has enough joy as well. I need to be physically, spiritually, and emotionally present in each day -- starting with today.


Katrina said...

Good thoughts, and I like the wonder/wander correlation! I'm the same way about not living in the present w/ the kids. Though I have several years yet before L's in Kindergarten, I'm already looking forward to next fall and the changes that preschool will bring.

But as I watch and anticipate his growing up, I realize Camden's growing just as quickly, and I don't know if I'm quite as prepared for the looming adolescence!

Lisa writes... said...

If I couldn't rest in the fact that God in His sovereignty is working it ALL out, I think I'd just lay down and quit right now!