Friday, May 08, 2009

Slipping Through My Fingers

When my friends and I saw Mamma Mia* on Broadway a couple of years ago, we laughed and laughed (the movie version is a pretty good representation as well). Towards the end of the show the mother is helping her daughter get ready for her wedding, and they sing "Slipping Through my Fingers." I looked over at my friend Nicole, and I noticed that she was tearing up.

As we were leaving, she said, "I got a little emotional there. I was thinking of me and my mom, and me and Kylie."

Kylie was only 5 or so at that time, but Nicole had the wisdom to know it's coming.

For me, the time has come, and this song is more prescient than ever.

Lyrics | Mama Mia! Soundtracks lyrics - Slipping Through My Fingers lyrics

Amanda keeps marching towards that independent phase of adolescence, questioning our rules and thinking she deserves the what's and why's instead of just doing what we say because we say it.

I can see it happening, and I can also see how quickly we could veer off-track.

The goal is to protect her and guide her in such a way that she doesn't know that we are protecting her and guiding her. We have to be firm, yet unwavering in our love.

Ultimately the goal of parenting is to get them to the point that they are responsible for their own decisions. I understand that. I just didn't think that it would be happening at 10 1/2.


Martha said...

Welcome to the world of the teens. It gets more challenging from here but I know you are up to the task.

Dad said...

You were between just under 12 when you started the real independence thing and your Mom would call me and say,"Would you come get your daughter for awhile". Fortunately, it did not get a lot worse as you aged into your teens; you handled it pretty well.
You were around 12 when I received the handmade birthday card saying "If it wasn't for you, I don't know what I would do".
Boy, that still brings a tear to the eye.

Brandi said...

Hi Jennifer. i'm guilty of reading on a feed reader and never seem to comment.
I can completely relate. Our oldest daughter will be 12 in June and we have been dealing with this for about a year. There are so many teachable moments during this delicate time. I have found that my response is critical. I just pray for guidance for myself and pray she will keep her focus on the cross instead of letting it become a distant shadow.

Katrina @ Callapidder Days said...

Oh, I can relate. I had a conversation with C. over the weekend that showed me just how close to all the growing up and independence he really is. Thinking for himself, questioning us and our opinions more. It's coming so quickly.